In today’s episode, I will explain a little about The Law of Pain. It is the next sequence of 15 Inevitable Laws of Growth.
“Every problem we face introduces a person to themselves.”
Starting from that statement, let’s dig deeper into this.
Pain, in its unique way, guides our decision-making process. We choose a path that aligns with the situation. It should resonate with our true selves, not conform to others’ expectations. Experiencing pain teaches us to summon the courage to confront the problems we’ve long ignored and set aside. Over time, it forges our resilience and shapes who we will become.
As long as we breathe, we still have roles to fill. So, no one has nothing to do. Sometimes, our minds wander, and the pessimistic side of us takes over. Instead of fighting against it and letting yourself get caught up in a miserable feeling, just remind yourself that as long as Someone above hasn’t asked you to leave this world, you still have a job to do. You have a role to finish and a goal to achieve.
If you believe in God’s grace and existence, you can ask yourself these following questions:
- What does God want from me?
- What can I do for Him?
- How will He use me to follow His crafted journey for me?
Bad Experiences?
No one expects or loves problems.
From many people’s success stories, we know that the greatest gains came in the middle of a painful process. Bad experiences are an inseparable part of life, no matter how hard we try to avoid them. Understanding this inevitability can help us prepare for the storms that may come our way. Only hoping for ups and ups is unrealistic. To lessen the impact of life’s storms, we need to have realistic expectations. It’s essential to be prepared for the challenges that come our way.
No one enjoys them
It’s painful to go through the process. However, we will enjoy talking about it at a particular moment. We will relish it when we get through it well. It’s like after finishing a battle, we boast our victory.
Bad experiences can lead to positive experiences
As our previous conclusion suggests, managing the painful experience eventually brings positive results. Those difficulties force us to move from our present stage, which can work either forward or backward. “Success in life comes not from holding a good hand, but in playing a poor hand well.” – Warren G. Lester.
Types of Pain mentions in the book:
- Inexperience — teach us to stay humble and acknowledge that there’s someone ahead.
- Incompetence –teach us what to improve and learn from our behavior.
- Disappointment — teach us that our plan often doesn’t work according to our plans.
- Conflict — teach us how to be careful with interaction and socialization.
- Change — teach us to embrace the new start and learn from the past.
- Lousy health — teach us to adopt a healthy lifestyle.
- Hard decisions — teach us that we can’t make everyone happy, so, prioritize what should be prioritized.
- Financial loss — teach us to be more careful and more thorough in making and examining decisions.
- Relationship loss — teach us that every start has an end, and there will be separation after one meeting.
- Not being the number 1 — teach us to reduce our ego and foster humility.
- Traveling — teach us to make the most of every moment with those who matter the most.
- Responsibility — teach us no matter we are trying to look good to everyone, in the end we can’t.
Turning Pain into Gain?
“Experience isn’t really the best teacher, but it’s an excuse for not repeating the same silly thing.” Here’s what we need to do to grow even when experiencing bad things:
Develop a positive life stance.
Life stance combines three crucial components: attitudes, assumptions, and expectations—not only about oneself but also about others and the world. We can’t always avoid bad things, but we have the power to handle them and decide how to react.
“Life is not the way it’s supposed to be. It’s the way it is. How you cope with it makes the difference.” — Virginia Satir.
“We are always capable of making life more enjoyable and making life’s lessons more learnable.“
Develop Creativity
“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone” — Neale Donald Walsh.
If you are someone who describe yourself for being ‘not creative,’ this sentence is for you: “Creativity reflects life and brings the key to turning pain into gain, by using adrenaline to solve problems and learn lessons.”
Significance of Bad Experiences
It’s always easier to see the positive aspects of a negative experience long after it happens, not during it. Also, it’s challenging to recognize negative experiences with a positive mindset. Which one are you?
One simple statement,
“When there is no struggle, there is no progress. Facing difficulties is inevitable, and learning from them is optional.”
Gain something and initiate change after bad experiences
“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” — James Baldwin.
Pain gives us momentum and an opportunity to turn our lives around. A bend in the road is our end if we fail to make the turn. To start making positive changes, we need to stabilize our feelings and emotions first. The heart of change lies not in our thinking but in our emotions.
“Strengthening our belief that our choices lead to self-discipline or the pain of regret.“
You can choose whether you want to face temporary pain, which in the long run leads to growth, or if you prefer temporary pleasure, which ultimately results in meaninglessness and regret.
Your life should be your top priority
Overcoming and learning from your bad experiences will free you from being labeled as a victim or drowning in self-pity. It’s tough to grow and become better if you don’t take responsibility for your life, decisions, and reactions.
“When there is no pain, there is no palm, no throne, no gall, no glory, no cross, no crown.” — William Penn.
Reference
The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth by John C. Maxwell. (2017, December 17). Playing the Infinite Game. https://playingtheinfinitegame.com/books/the-15-invaluable-laws-of-growth-by-john-c-maxwell/
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